For Day 9 of NaPoWriMo, the prompt challenged us to include a line in our poem that we were afraid to write. It turns out I wrote more than one line I've been afraid to write and admit out loud.
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I am lost.
In a world full of people going places,
I am standing still.
In a place where everyone
seems to know what they want,
I am blank.
When it appears other moms
have time to take care of their kids
and take care of themselves too,
I am a mess.
When it looks like all the people
around me have close friends
they can really talk to,
I am alone.
And I am afraid.
I'm afraid to be alone without friends to support me.
I'm afraid to lose myself in my children
and that I'm not raising them well enough.
I'm afraid I won't find my calling, my passion,
and that I won't feel fulfilled outside of the home.
I'm afraid that I'll be lost in the dark forever,
stumbling, never finding solid ground.